CSI Miami “Flight Risk” Have Airsickness Bags Ready

Image from CBS
Don’t bother watching CSI Miami (CBS) “Flight Risk” if you haven’t done so. The whole episode is a crime scene. The episode is about a murder of a flight attendant on an aircraft. Her bloody body is found as it spills out onto the baggage claim carousel. As the investigation continues, there are so many things that are so incredibly ridiculous that I my forehead is black and blue because I smacked my head so much in disbelief.

The obvious: How can a woman carry and dump a body into an area where passengers are sitting and have no one see her do it? I can’t believe that the air marshal was the only one sitting in that whole first class area, or that when he left his seat that it left no one else in the area to see the other flight attendant drop a body into an access panel in the floor. Next obvious question, how does a flight attendant - on her own – stuff that same body into some baggage on her own? Lucky for her, there was a bag with what looked like sporting equipment in it so she could fit the body in there. What would she have done with the body if there weren’t a big enough bag in there?

Even more hideous was the sugary daydream scene where Eric (Adam Rodriguez) fantasizes that he and Calleigh (Emily Proctor) are flying first class somewhere. It gets worse later when Eric is examining luggage tags to try to match handwriting on a stalker letter to the flight attendant with one of the passengers, and Calleigh arrives and she makes her lovesick eyes at Eric. Excuse me; I must get my airsickness bag.

If there is anyone out there who knows all there is to know about airplanes, please tell me that the “Romper Room” is really just a CSI Miami invention. Please tell me, please. And if they do exist, what do they really call them, because ‘Romper Room” just has such a weird connotation to it.

And isn’t is just amazing that Horatio’s (David Caruso) weird spawn - I mean son – Kyle, – who seems to have had no previous works skills, can now be working in the morgue and actually seems OK with touching a body? When he casually lifted up the stewardess’s dead hand I thought that was odd. He also didn’t seem to recoil at the thought of them doing a sex kit on the body. Kyle seems a little to eager to learn about working with dead bodies, it kind of icks me out a bit. Where IS my airsickness bag?

Was Ryan’s (Jonathan Togo) comment to Boa Vista (Eve La Rue) about Eric and Calleigh having some sort of "thing" an attempt to make Boa Vista jealous, or was Ryan just a little peeved about the relationship himself? Personally, I find Calleigh very unattractive as she seems so stiff and cold, and Eric a little too naïve and immature, and even more childlike since his shooting. What an odd couple. I am also not sure if someone is getting a little heavy handed with the hair straightener for Boa Vista, because I don’t think her hair can get plastered any closer to her head.

Sadly, they seem to be cutting back severely on the Horatio one-liners at the beginning of the show. I wonder if the writers were running out of ideas, or if they just got tired of the ridicule. But without the Horatio one-liner, it seems like the opening scream is such a waste!

So unless you have a strong stomach – a very strong stomach – or have an ample supply of airsickness bags handy, I’d tell you to stay away from “Flight Risk.” It is guaranteed to nauseate.

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